April 4, 2004:
Friends, Romans, Commonwealth Students:So do you want to know how committed I am to quote of the week? I'll tell you- it's 8:30 on a Sunday morning and I'm sitting in the dark recesses of my basement, typing up this e-mail while my teeth chatter and my fingers turn blue. Ok, so maybe it's not QUITE that dramatic, but still!
Do you feel empty? Like you're missing something? You probably do, you probably are, and you can solve both problems by increasing your weekly dosage of quote of the week by signing up for honorable mentions- just go to qotw.net.
Congrats to Roz for last week's winning quote, "You poser. You're like the N*SYNC of slacking off. Completely commercial. Doing it for looks. Sure, all the teen girls idolize you. But you're not living it." And, at long last, the quotes!
"For me, homosexuality is like vegetarianism: I don't understand it as a way of life, but I'm willing to accept it." -Matt Kraning
"Sex ed teachers always acted as if we were about to go out and have hot passionate sex with every third person we met, and for Christ's sake could we at least remember to bring along the condoms? But in reality, we've just ended up a generation of sexually incompetent people who are really good at putting condoms on bananas." -Becca
"Was Newton married? Because then you could be Newton's In-Laws." -Ben Orlin
"Crass materialism won out, as it did all over the world." -Mr. Harsanyi, on the Union beating the Confederacy in the Civil War
"There's a fine line between artistic and just plain ugly." -Lily
"Why do they always name quilting stores things like 'the pumpkin patch' why not 'the acid drop quilting shop'? I'd like an upper with that calico." -Beth LaDow, Kate's mom
"Where's the rest of the goddam building?" -Joanna, appreciating ancient Roman ruins.
"I smell conspiracy. And I don't smell well, so it must be strong." -Zoe
"Yes, Buddha and his Budhette." -Ms. Grant
"Sleep, the poor man's energy bar" -Paul Cavallaro
-Dewey "OH MAN I'm freezing" Cyr
April 4, 2004: Honorable Mentions
Faithful Honorable Mentionites, your quotes:"Obviously the Constitution isn't meant to protect YOUR right to bear arms! How could it? You weren't even alive when it was written; they didn't even know you!" -Julian
"That is one of the oldest tricks in politics: accuse your opponent of insanity. Of course, sometimes it's true. But Johnson wasn't insane; he was just inept and racist." -Mr. Harsanyi, on the impeachment of Andrew Johnson
"That's the whole point of education: to make biology and history so repetitive or traumatic that you have to remember." -Ms. Nulty
"The question isn't 'what's the curve,' it's 'what's the area under the curve." -Orlin, after Alex asked how much the Calculus AP is curved
"Is this some sort of virtual sex?" -Micheline after Jeff wanted to 'direct connect' over AIM
"Why do they always name quilting stores things like 'the pumpkin patch' why not 'the acid drop quilting shop'? I'd like an upper with that calico." -Beth LaDow, Kate's mom
"I fell into a burning ring of toast
And it burned burned burned
And my toast began to roast
And I ate ate ate
My ring of toast."
-Joanna
"They didn't conjugate verbs. They killed people." -Kate, challenging Mr. Conolly's Latin game.
"Burger King, the breakfast of champions" -Paul Cavallaro
"It's kind of funny how the large bills have people that, in the grand scheme of things, are kind of b-rate historical figures." -Alex George
-Dewey "OH MAN I'm finished" Cyr
