April 18, 2004: Honorable Mentions
Honorable MentionsAnother batch of fresh Honorable Mentions, to delight all the little boys and girls and, er, all the rest of you.
"I'm about to give you a hint about how to make your life less miserable, which is the adverse of what I usually do, which is to try and make your life more miserable, so take this chance and run with it." - Mr. Young
"Did you just ask to please my paper?" - Micheline
"Just imagine [the yoyos] are Oompa Loompas with ropes tied around their necks." Mr. Phillips
"Grapefruits come in sections?" - Kate
"My ribs are so beautiful!" - Eric "Sausage Boy" Hanss, misreading French
"Imagine I am a flower. A pretty little flower." - Mr. Hodgkins
"There isn't a dwarf named Smacky, is there?" - Miller
"Opera is over-rated. It's all over-emoting, large Teutonic women." - Mr. Young
"Of course, it would've been different if Hamlet forgot himself WITH Laertes ." Anonymous Junior
"[The word 'ingens' is Vergil's] maid of all work, cook, slut, and butler." - Classicist Henry, on Vergil
"Superman sperm-that stuff scares me!" - Ms. Nulty
Joanna "I don't smoke Latin" Rifkin
