January 19, 2003:
Voters:Last week's race was the closest ever (and exactly the reason I introduced instant runoff voting). Joanna wound up barely edging out Jack (congratulations, Joanna!) by a count of 8-7 once all other quotes were eliminated. The winning quote was: "This is just me being Catholic and pretentious, and I'm not even Catholic!" with regards to a part of her story.
There's been much complaint lately that the Honorable Mentions are the best quotes. So I've decided to eliminate the Honorable Mentions category and just let every quote be a nominee. What this means is that (EVERYBODY READ THE REST OF THIS PARAGRAPH) you can list as many of the nominees as you want. Your vote will obviously be more effective the more people that you list, but if you only want to list your top three or five, that's acceptable.
Also, please submit your ballot in the following form:
1. Bob Dole
2. Al Gore
3. Walter Mondale
4. Paul McCartney
i.e. just list the names with numbers next to them; don't list the quotes themselves. If one person has two quotes nominated (like Alex this week), please distinguish between them in parentheses, thusly:
1. Bob Dole (cars)
2. Al Gore
3. Bob Dole (Viagra)
4. Paul McCartney
Alright, now THE NOMINEES:
"Raiders of the Lost Ark may be one of the greatest things that organized religion ever inspired. I mean, it certainly beats the pro-life movement." -Alex George
"No sexual acts on my grandmother." -Josh Haselkorn
"We start calculus in nine months and you know what that means? Someone is pregnant with my graphing calculator." -Roswell Thomas
"Why does everyone feel the need to be constantly touching Miller?" -Fiona Boger
"We're not harems, we're good friends." -Julian Hyde
"Harrison Ford is best when fighting Nazis, or their futuristic counterparts." -Alex George
"I've heard about you. You're the three-parter." -Assembly Speaker, to Mr. Young
" 'Rural' is the kiss of death." -Becca
"Superstition is good when it works." -Mariah
"Everyone wants a piece of Reilly." -Micheline
-Ben "The Dirt and the Grime that is Modern Crime" Orlin
