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April 27, 2003:

YOU MUST READ THIS ENTIRE EMAIL

Voters:

Last week's winner was "That's because in 1942 the British Government discontinued the singing orphan program." -Julian, on the lack of songs like 'Food' from the musical Oliver.

How to vote (EVERYONE MUST READ THIS PARAGRAPH): List as many of the nominees as you wish in order from favorite to least favorite. List only the person's name, not the entire quote. Number your list. Render names as they are rendered here (i.e. don't change Copans to Ben Copans or Ms. Jackman to Jackman). Distinguish between two quotes from the same person using parenthetical statements like "Ms. Jackman (alien)". Do NOT use parenthetical statements for all quotes.

Anyone interested in doubling their QOTW ration and being informed of the winner as soon as it is chosen each week should request to join the Quote of the Week Honorable Mentions Exclusive Cool Person Club (QOTWHMECPC).

And now, the NOMINEES:
"We all die eventually. We're slowly being oxidized." -Ms. Jackman
"A chick flick." -Miller, on Jane Eyre
"You have two futures, and both lie in Cambridge: Harvard or McClean. The choice is yours." -Copans, to Orlin, on the latter's excessive junior year courseload. McClean is a mental institution in Cambridge, Massachusetts.
"Everything in Florida is fake, Becky. Let's just face it." -Ms. Jackman
"It's a sheet made out of matzo. It will revolutionize the clothing industry." -Roz
"I didn't see you either, Matt!" -Jean, approximately 5'1", after bumping into 6'2" Matt Kraning
"Did anyone else feel like they were doing the hokey pokey? You know, you put your sexuality in, you take your sexuality out, you put your liberalism in and you shake it all about." -Joanna, on the Health and Community Workshop on 'identity'
"Emily, you don't look like a motorcyclist. You look like the prize that they give away after the motorcycle race." -Miller, to Emily
"I'm a non-resident alien. I put makeup on every morning so you can't see my green skin." -Ms. Jackman
"Those dating services work on a whole lot of scary math. And the people who create the math probably never get dates." -Alex, on online dating services
"Roswell Thomas... James Sanna... Dewey Cyr... Mariah Carey..." -Mr. Weisman, listing people signed up for the MIT event 'Beaver Dash'. He meant to say 'Mariah Pepper.'

Voting closes 5:00 on Tuesday.

-Ben "you're hopelessly mainstream; pass it on" Orlin

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April 27, 2003: Honorable Mentions

This week's winning quote: "Did anyone else feel like they were doing the hokey pokey? You know, you put your sexuality in, you take your sexuality out, you put your liberalism in and you shake it all about." -Joanna, on the Health and Community Workshop on 'identity'.

Judging by the vote count, Joanna's was the most popular quote in modern QOTW history. She earned 11 of the 21 first-place votes--the only time a nominee has ever had a true majority.

This week's Honorable Mentions:
"We got about half-way, but then Rostam was too big and wouldn't fit." -Cameron, on Rostam trying on her clothes
"Molecular junk-mail: 'Make your London Dispersion Forces 10-15% bigger, stronger, and longer-lasting!'" -Miller
"Bush's junk-mail: Make your oil reserves 15-20% bigger." -Miller
"Pfau's junk-mail: Make yourself 15-20% bigger." -Miller
"They just don't know how to manipulate their variables." -Roz, in response to Alex's nominated quote ("Those [online] dating services work on a whole lot of scary math. And the people who create the math probably never get dates.")
"I'll manipulate YOUR variables." -Joanna, in response to Roz's quote
"This is a Ms. Nulty moment." -Cameron, on Ms. Jackman discussing the conductivity of her butt
"Excuse me for being a real man." -Roz, on his shaving habits
"I'd like to speak with Mariah Carey after announcements." -Mr. Wharton, in response to Mr. Weisman's nominated quote (listing Mariah Carey as a student at Commonwealth)
"So let's talk about death. Because no matter how good your medicine is, you die eventually." -Ms. Grant, making the transition from Chinese medicine to Chinese views of death
"It's a strange combination of real grief and people in the kitchen telling jokes." -Ms. Grant, on funerals
"So the water molecules are like adulterous Mormons!" -Joanna, learning about Hydrogen bonds

-QOTW Management

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